Style bhais of the movies are becoming an extinct species. My jaw hasn’t hit the floor, of late, on scanning Page 3 — at times Page 5 or 7 or 8 — displaying screen heroes on their way to post-midnight shebangs. Their hair’s tousled, they’re overdressed or under, and bargain sale accessories are conspicious by their presence. The tinsel guys just aren’t making a style statement anymore.

Not since Salman Khan curled his hair into big black commas on his forehead, like former President APJ Abdul Kalam’s, for Tere Naam. Not since he sprouted a toothbrush moustache (suspiciously stuck on) for Dabangg, which will hopefully be tweezed for the sequel. And in the designer shirts and jackets department, not since Shah Rukh Khan went Hilfiger-DKNY for Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. All seems so once-upon-a-time, as in a Prince Disarming fairy tale. Now anything goes, unless you count Imraan Khan’s genuflection to Robert Pattinson from the Twilight Zone series: hair spiked but not quite. No heroine, or for that matter besotted fan, would dare to ruffle Imraan Khan’s coiffure, it would take an age to re-fix.
Now why am I making a to-do about a hero’s look? I shouldn’t. After all it’s acting calibre that’s paramount. Absolutely correct. I’m simply making a point that, like it or not, it’s a given in a business rooted in glamour.
Indeed, the star-pack have dictated style trends which have lasted to this day and age. Dev Anand’s puff in the hair, Dilip Kumar’s long-sleeved shirts (he didn’t wear short-sleeves because of jungle-like hair on the hands), Rajesh Khanna’s guru kurta shirts, Feroz Khan’s cowboy hat-‘n’-boots, and Shashi Kapoor’s bell-bottoms beneath wide collar silk shirts. Whoa, these are just some of the guys who had the attitude. Or what could be called an ‘anokhi ada’ in Bolly argot..
Today actors alter their looks, briefly, in accordance with the role they’re playing at the moment. And for heaven’s sake, they also hide the makeover from the press and public. For instance, I have to still decode why Shahid Kapur kept his Mausam look a nuclear-formula secret. There was just that extra toothbrush moustache attempting to lend gravitas (in vain) to a babyish face.
Anyone who goes bald also toots a horn about what a deadly look he’s cultivated, all for enhancing his performance. Such dedication. Sorry guys, Persis Khambatta beat you in that department eons ago. Next, Shabana Azmi and Nandita Das went though the tonsured route for Water. Since the project had to be recast, Lisa Ray did too. The bald truth is that among the males the Yul Brynner dome suited Amrish Puri most of all. Mogambo lives.
Perhaps it’s just a barren phase. Maybe tomorrow you will find another film legend whose trademark will be sharply-cut Savile Row suits like Mehboob Khan’s used to be. There could be a movie mogul like B.R. Chopra who will never tolerate a crease on his shirt. And an actor who’ll look as snug as Rishi Kapoor did in his double-knit cardigans.
Actually, my two nominees who could bring back pizzazz to the scene are: one, Ranbir Kapoor (the Rockstar look was super effective) but an off-screen RK Jr signature isn’t legible yet. It’s forming. And second, Karan Johar, who has to reinvent all the designs which are a must at every mehndi and sangeet ceremony across the world. There’s no one who knows haute couture as instinctively as he does.
All the crazily expensive designer and assorted stylists — hair, make-up, facials — believe me, need to be shaken out of their indolence. Or else Caprio stubbles, Pattinson spikes, Oxford Street pret-a-porter and faux accessoriries are all you’ll get.
Vis-a-vis heroines, I’m not even going there. At the risk of being throttled, I can’t help saying it out loud and clear, I’m bored out of my skull with those Sabyasachi Mukherjee saris. They have so much stuff going on them that I get a migraine. Meanwhile for men, could I beg for a classic, yet of-the-moment-look please? It’s possible.