Insurmountable obstacles
Philip Henslowe: Mr Fennyman, allow me to explain about the theatre business. The natural condition is one of the insurmountable obstacles on the road to imminent disaster.
Hugh Fennyman: So what do we do?
Philip Henslowe: Nothing. Strangely enough, it all turns out well.
Hugh Fennyman: How?
Philip Henslowe: I don’t know. It’s a mystery.
The above words are from the iconic 1998 film Shakespeare in Love. This level of insight could only have come from someone who is acutely aware of the travails and tribulations of the profession. Tom Stoppard, who wrote the film, has encapsulated the struggles of a theatrewallah perfectly. And particularly this week, these words have especially strong significance to me.
There is a performance of our new play tomorrow and day after at the NCPA. However, a week ago, one of the four-person ensemble cast hurt her back. So in order that the “show must go on”, we replaced her with another fine actress.
A week is enough time to blood a new actor in, we reasoned. Four days ago, one of the male actors got struck down by the terrible viral flu, which seems to be more popular than Facebook these days. A quick huddle later, the director, Vivek Madan, gallantly offered to step in for these shows. All problems solved or so we thought.
Last evening we received the disturbing news that the other male actor in the play has also been hit by the flu. What he thought was a minor cold and throat irritation has turned into a raging fever accompanied by the customary body ache and all the regular symptoms of that dreaded F word.
Having three of the four actors out, and a show less than 48 hours away, we are left with a choice (not quite Sophie’s, but a difficult one all the same): Do we stage a performance of a play that is probably much more inferior to the high standards we set ourselves? Or the dreaded word of all producers. CANCEL! It would not be the first time a show has been cancelled. Accidents happen all the time. Some of the road variety: especially for youth groups who often find themselves at the receiving end of motorbike accidents involving their actors.Other accidents happen on stage itself. A few years ago Faezeh Jalali broke her arm during a stunt at the end of act 1. And although she wanted to continue the fact that it looked like she had two elbows quickly decided the issue in favour of stopping the show midway. But for something as silly as a virus to knock down plays is just ridiculous. As if the theatre didn’t have enough demons to battle like rain, traffic, lack of audiences, etc.
So in our present predicament, we have dug deep and come up with a compromise. The old adage has been modified into “some kind of show must go on”.
Come this weekend, we will not be staging the full fledged version of Nostalgia Brand Chewing Gum. We have decided instead to do a staged reading. Patrons with tickets will be refunded, and a hat will be laid out for a more “pay as you like” option.
The temporary cast (that now includes yours truly) will take the stage and read the play on the existing set, for those patrons who have made plans, braved the traffic and ended up at the NCPA to see a performance.
We hope they will be understanding and the riots will be kept to a minimum!
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