Flush goes Bollywood this Diwali

Quite naturally show business sparks up, come Diwali. Pujas at production offices, designer gifts couriered to the most-in-demand players of the season and card parties, are the done thing. Let’s get together, guys. Celebrities at the wheel — presumably the chauffeurs are on leave — honk at the hosts’ bungalow gates, darting we’re-so-publicity-shy expressions at the posse of paparazzi. Shy? Not really. Just unconvincing acting.
Not very different from the screenplays on Id, Christmas or New Year’s Eve, if the Diwali celebrations have an edge, it’s because of the drama-packed card parties. Lakhs and crores can go up in smoke, or fabulous fortunes are made at the taash tournaments. These can last for a marathon two-days-two-nights, sometimes more. The stakes are high at the tables of the yesteryear heroes (read Jeetendra), moderate at the ersatz casinos of the mid-generation superstars (Shah Rukh Khan), and cutie-pooh at the homes of those who just wanna have fun, and not necessarily convey the great gambler instincts (read Amitabh Bachchan and family).
The Lifetime Achievement Award for the most substantial contribution to the Diwali week dhamakas, however, goes to Jeetendra once described as Jumping Jack.
Whether that was a compliment or a canard, depended entirely on your regard for his rambunctious dances of yore. For sure, responses to Jeetu sir’s boogies weren’t an acquired taste. Either you whistled wildly at his leaps — in white shoes, white pair of tight trousers — or strictly avoided Farz, Tohfa, Mawali, Jyoti Bane Jwala, etceteras unlimited. Pause: these were all superhits like Salman Khan head-Dabanggers are nowadays.
Like a magic Diwali firecracker, Jeetendra is still all lit up, during the festive week. And you adore him for that. The man at 69 is utterly unpretentious, 365 days a year actually. Not so long ago, at a wedding reception, he pointed proudly at his cool grey suit and then at Rakesh Roshan’s even cooler indigo Armani, smiling wide, “Do you know we got these at dirt cheap discounted rates at a Dubai sale? Good no?”
An utterly boyish confession that, but Roshan turned redder than tomato puree. Indeed, Rakesh Roshan, Rishi Kapoor, and Prem Chopra have formed Mumbai’s most enduring buddy club.
An annual general meeting is a must on Diwali. Only the late Sujit Kumar, who had an amazing fan following in Mauritus thanks to the early Bhojpuri films, won’t be there anymore.
Jeetendra’s bungalow at Juhu-Vile Parle no longer houses daughter Ekta Kapoor who has moved to digs of her own. Ektaji has her own card blanche comprising those associated with her TV serials. Rival soap stars? Ha, no way.
At dad Jeetendra’s tables, the game is teen patti or flush. Ditto, everywhere, unless the players opt for a softer option called paploo. That happens at the Big and Small Bachchans’.
Over to Shah Rukh and Gauri Khan’s, who over time and tide, don’t need an excuse to party, be it a welcome bash for Akon or a seasonal farewell for the Kolkata Knight Riders. Paris Hilton got the royal ignore though.
Besides champagning global peers, every festival means celebration. And why not? The Khans like to be Rah Rah: One. The invitation list remains largely unaltered, but for the absence of another Khan who lives down the lane.
Shabana Azmi-Javed Akhtar, the epitome of secularism, may not plan lavish-budgeted parties on Id, Holi or Diwali. Yet their home in Juhu is an open house, with oodles of poetry in the air. Gulzar’s Diwali is more intimate, with Raakhee rustling up a home-cooked fish dinner accompanied by varieties of dessert for the family. On Diwali, it would be difficult to say that Gulzar-Raakhee are separated. Sweeeeet!
There may be many more — like Sanjay Dutt-Manyata. Akshay Kumar-Twinkle Khanna, Shilpa Shetty-Raj Kundra, the new party hosts in show town — who will bring in the festival of lights with a shebang. Still, nothing quite compares to Jeetendra’s Jumping Jack flush.
Happy Diwali.

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