Duality in life is a given. It is the very nature of life. Joy, sorrow, happiness, sadness, good fortune, misfortune, illness and wellness, birth and death — alternate with unrelenting regularity. Sometimes a run of bad luck comes after a long spell of good luck, sometimes one event follows another all too quickly before we can even catch our breath — like in the case of a close relative in whose family three people of various ages passed on in quick succession.

Sometimes, we are caught off-guard as in the case of a very dear one where illness struck without warning and was made more painful by a rather long recovery with potential complications looming large.
What we yearn for in such times is for some strength to lift us, take away our burden and see us through the dark and stormy times. We wish for a person or higher power who will hear our pleas, come to our rescue, whisper comforting words to us, make those difficult decisions (Do I close this deal? Do I call it a day? Should I seek a second opinion?) and administer a healing touch. We long for the good times again, we crave that happiness and peace that so eludes us and simply don’t feel up to the test.
Often it doesn’t occur to us that the right sources of assistance are here before us or within us. That’s how badly clouded our vision is at such a low ebb in life. In our confused state of mind we look hither and thither for guidance and insight. Turning to the wrong people is one of the most terrible things one can do in such a situation. Often the people whom we turn to have no clear idea of our problem — they are no experts in this particular area that is bothering us — be it a relationship issue or a technical problem or a financial conundrum. They haven’t been through what we are going through. They don’t have the same set of dynamics to contend with. So the chances are that the solution that they suggest may be completely unacceptable to us. But having solicited their time and advice one usually, out of politeness, just nods in feigned agreement.
The exercise of stating the problem to a third person can be draining. It also makes us impatient because we are looking for quick fix solutions and remedies. The only plus factor is that it can sometimes be cathartic.
How so?
Miraculously, sometimes, while articulating a problem we are hit by a wave of clarity. A solution suggests itself. Or it may come to us in a moment of grace and silence when we are communing with a higher power. Which is when we should realise that inner strength lies right within us. And that is where we should have looked in the first place. For a bit of the Divine or the higher self is enshrined within each of us. It is just that we turn to this inner light rarely as we are so blissfully ignorant of its existence.
Very often people who have been hit by unspeakable tragedies bounce back much to the amazement of all around. Where did they draw the strength to do that? From within of course. One is not talking here of physical strength or muscle power but of spiritual and moral strength, the ability to accept what life hands us and handle it with poise, equanimity and faith and emerge stronger from the experience. One can read all the self-help books available and pick up a few pointers, kith and kin can lend a helping hand and a shoulder to cry on but ultimately one has to face up to the situation all by one’s self.
It is solely because of one’s own inner strength that one tides over the problem. As Rachael Birmingham, Australian author, mentor and television personality, observed, “Through adversity not only are we given an opportunity to discover our inner strength, we are also given the gift of foresight so we can shine a light for others who go through the experience after us.”
If one had to come up with a three-point solution for finding inner strength, here goes...
First, intensify your prayers and strengthen your connection to the Divine in times of stress. Talk to this power like you would to a friend or compose a letter. You can bare your soul without fear of having this used against you. Seek the solutions you want — always remember of course that what you ask for should be just and in line with the Divine order.
Second, bear in mind that silence and solitude will help you find the strength and answers you want. While it is a relief to unburden oneself to a trusted adult or elder, retreat into solitude and silence after that. Talking endlessly and keeping one’s eyes open results in the loss of energy as opposed to maintaining stillness and silence and keeping one’s eyes closed. Either do this in a place of worship or in your own little altar.
Third, know that nothing in life is permanent. In a few months time all this will be behind you. As the Bible says, “This too shall pass.”
And do remember that the Heavenly Father will never let you be tested beyond your strength. As Marcus Aurelius the sixteenth Roman Emperor, philosopher, thinker and writer famously said: “Look well into thyself. There are sources of strength which will always spring up if thou wilt always look.”