Relationships deserve honesty

Mar 03, 2013 - Anupam Kher

I am a 20-year-old boy in the second year of BE. During my schooldays, almost three years ago, I befriended a girl. We became good friends and used to chat regularly. But during my Class 12 Boards, I stopped using my cellphone in order to concentrate on studies. I stopped talking to her. But after joining college, I tried to get in touch with her many times. She doesn’t reply to my messages. I want to apologise. Her silence is upsetting me. What should I do?
Anonymous

A. My dear, get back to studying. Focus the way you did when you kept your phone aside the previous time. If you have the power to stay away from distractions, please do so. It’s important to stop going after someone, especially a girl, if she has chosen to not respond. There could be many reasons why she doesn’t want to renew contact. Since you switched off from her when you felt like it, I think it is important to allow her the space as well. Besides, at 20 you should focus on your work, studies, friends, parents, country and many other things. All the best.

Is it okay to have a relationship of love with a new person when there is already another one from the past?
Sachin

A. Relationships are unique. What two people share is unique to them. Ideally, I believe that relationships deserve honesty, loyalty, truth. It’s a strange idea to say you love someone and feel okay to have an equation with someone else alongside. Sometimes certain relationships are so strained because of various issues that there’s nothing left in them. I feel one should give a closure to one relationship if one chooses to begin another. I believe in goodness, togetherness, friendship, truth, and as a culture we do stand for these values in a relationship. These days, people have a great sense of individuality, and hence there will be a need for greater compromise, tolerance and understanding. It’s very easy to move from one relationship to another. But in life it’s important to have good lasting relationships, whether with family, friends, or with the person one loves.

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