Saas-bahu relationships shift gear

Lawyers working in the family court have found a change for the better in joint families and the saas-bahu relationship. Urban parents of today are more accommodating when it comes to saving the marriage of their children. If there are differences with the daughter-in-law, they are willing to make compromises to save the marriage of their children. They are also becoming more liberal when it comes to inter-religious and inter-caste marriages.

Advocates note that in a number of cases where divorce petitions had been filed or spouses are estranged, parents are playing a key role in reuniting their son and daughter-in-law. Family court lawyer Ms Anita Salabh Jain said, “Recently, we got a case where the daughter-in-law had found the working mother-in-law too interfering and always criticising her. Domestic squabbles between the two had also affected the husband-wife relationship, leading them to seek a divorce. However, at the time of counselling the parties, the mother-in-law promised to befriend her daughter-in-law and even agreed that her son, his wife, and grandchild could shift to a separate house. It was mainly an ego problem between the mother-in-law who is a working woman and the daughter-in-law, who is a housewife.”

In another case, the parents intervened to save their son’s marriage. They were unaware that he smoked and drank occasionally. He was living separately from his wife and was on the verge of a divorce. “We were shocked to find that he drinks and smokes and even visited some questionable massage parlours. He said job and stress in family life had prompted him to do so. For his well-being, we spoke to our daughter-in-law who wanted to split from our son and ultimately reunited them. We are now a happy family,” said Mr Om Prakash, the father.

When it comes to giving consent for marriages too, a number of parents are willingly agreeing to inter-religious marriages under the Special Marriage Act, and inter-caste marriage as well, say lawyers.

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