Widows break barriers

Jaipur: They have been considered as a bad omen for the family. They were not allowed to wear jewellery and colourful clothes, but now widows have stood up against discrimination and have broken the traditional barriers of the society, which debar them from decorating hands with henna.
Over 300 single women assembled in Jaipur recently and raised voice against the discrimination. The widows applied henna on their hands and wore jewellery as a mark of their protest.
“The time has gone when we were cornered and symbolised inauspicious. Now we are ready to fight with such an injustice meted out to the widows in the society,” says Kamal Pathik, a widow from Jhalawar.
It was the “Ekal Nari Shakti Sangathan’” (ENSS) headed by Ginni Shrivastva which organised a conference of the single woman. “Despite several laws and reforms, the plight of the widow is the same. The society is yet to change its attitude. Widows and single women are still the most marginalised section of the society,” Ms Shrivastva said.
Hailing from a village in the tribal dominated district of Banswara, Kachari Bai widowed at early age. She took shelter at her parent’s house with two kids, but soon she was thrown out by her relatives. “Na peehar or na sasural me mujhe madad mili, ab is sangthan ne mujhe hosla diya hai, aur main khush hun. (Neither my in-laws, nor my parents helped me. Now this organisation has encouraged me and I am happy),” says Kachari.
According to the ENSS, there are over five crore widows in India. “Most of them are illiterate and it has worsens their problems. Globalisation has further reduced job opportunities in countryside and small towns. The widows are told not to wear colourful clothes, keep themselves away from any auspicious occasion. But here, we broke all such barriers,” says Ms Shrivastva.
“My all dreams were shattered when my husband died two decades ago. I was forbidden from moving out and confined to the house. Even when I walk on streets, people change their way considering me inauspicious,” said Gopi Bai, who comes from a small town Gogunda in Udaipur.
“Was it my fault when I lost my husband?” she asks.
“After almost 20 years, I wore jewellery and applied henna on my hands because the organisation gave me the inspiration,” says Gopi Bai.
Ms Shrivastva was born in Canada but for more than two decades, she has been helping single women in society. “Being single, you are weak. But when all such women come together and join hands, they make a strong voice,” she says.
Banswara’s Kachari said when a man loses his wife, no one blames him. Infact, people approach him with offers for a new match. Why this discrimination with woman, she asks. “Not only in Hindu society, widows are also ill-treated in Muslim society,” says Jaitoon, who comes from Muslim-dominated town of Tonk.

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