Building a relationship takes time, ending it is quick. And it’s got quicker. The tech-savvy generation likes a clean break, minus the drama of tears and recriminations, and finds it convenient to call it quits via text messages. A recent survey claims that one in 10 people are dumped through text messages.
If celebs such as Britney Spears could dump Kevin Federline a text message, “I wnt 2 dvrce u”, and if rumours are to be believed actress Asin Thottumkal texted “It’s over”, to beau Neil Nitin Mukesh and called it quits, it surely looks like text dumping is here to stay.
Many feel this is the most easy and suitable way to terminate a not so serious relationship or fling. Shares Ankita Sharma (name changed on request), who recently dumped her month-old date informing him she’s “not interested”. Ankita clarifies, “I am not in favour of ending relationships on cellphones, but this guy was an exception. I barely went out with him two-three times and realised he’s just not my kind of person. Avoiding his calls and not replying to his SMSes didn’t help, so I decided to spell it out for him. He said I was being rude, but frankly I got tired of giving hints. It wasn’t an emotional relationship, so text message was the next best option for me.”
Some take SMSes far too seriously and give up on relationships. Megha Sachdeva, 26, consultant shares, “I broke up with my boyfriend over SMSes. We had an argument over the phone, and it continued over several messages during the night. At one point, I wrote to him, ‘Let’s call it quits’, and he replied saying ‘Fine’.”
What shocked Megha was his cold response next day. “When I called him up, he sounded distant and when I asked what was the matter, he replied that we had been right to end it the previous night. I couldn’t believe it, he took my message seriously and wasn’t willing to patch up,” she adds.
However, breaking up is an art, and not everyone can master it. Agrees Mohammed Ali, who works with a BPO and says, “There’s a way to go about ending relationships. I’ve dumped many girls over text messages but I never blame them for the break-up. I always say it’s my fault, I am to blame which makes them sympathetic towards me and I save my friendship too. As a personal rule, I don’t publicise my relationship status on social networking site. It’s not for the world to know what I am upto.”
While some youngsters are okay with calling it quits with the help of technology, there are others like Ruchi Shekhawat, DU student, who demands a face-to-face interaction.
“When you are in a relationship, you have the right to demand explanations from your partner. How can the person be so disrespectful that he does not even want to face you when he is calling off the relationship? On a personal level, I would never settle for an SMS break-up.”
Dr Geetanjali Kumar, psychologist and counsellor, sums up, “Ending a relationship is an unpleasant task and using SMS to end it an escapist’s attitude. It is easier and slightly comfortable for the person who doesn’t want to witness the emotional outburst. The youngsters believe in ‘I, My Life’ attitude. There is so much of ‘I’, self-centeredness among the youth today.”