Happy to let go
Quit worrying about dealing with the seven-year itch, because latest findings in the divorce market reveal that couples these days are now comfortable with letting go only after spending a few decades with their partner. Rupert Murdoch divorced his second wife after 32 years. Both are now happily re-married.
Former American Vice President Al Gore and his wife Tipper decided to separate after recently celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary! Sean Penn and his ex-wife Robin divorced last year after being together for 20 years! The best part about the above mentioned couples is that they seem happy to be letting go, no bitterness or devastation here.
In a recent interview Sean says, “She is a ghost to me now. We spent all those years together. Now she’s just gone.” And he ain’t complaining since he has suddenly discovered the joys of being single. Al and Tipper Gore too stated that they remain on friendly terms. They are looking forward to now doing their own thing.
But after spending practically the best part of your lives with each other, sharing children and learning to work around the flaws, why would you want to suddenly go solo? What is equally surprising is that people claim not to miss someone who was such an integral part of their lives till say a few months ago. Is it really a case of distance makes the heart forget?
The answer is yes. After decades together, you know you have truly given the relationship your best shot and that the person is not worth suffering another minute. Dr Chitra Srivastav, who works for the Delhi commission for women says, “One realises that his/her spouse doesn’t care for her. Now that the kids have grown up and there are no more responsibilities, the person feels he/she doesn’t have to tolerate someone and their attitude anymore. There comes a point in your life where you feel you should now concentrate on yourself.” Also, at a later stage in life, many feel they have enough savings and finances to be truly independent. When couples who have been together for years decide to move on, they have got all their options worked out.
Dr Rajat Mitra, director Swancheten Society for Mental Health says, “When long-term relationships come to an end, it’s usually a well planned action. You have seen the split coming, have over the years discussed and tried dealing with recurrent problems and have dealt with the feeling of separation.” Divorce isn’t a hasty decision here.
Sean Penn and his ex had a topsy-turvy relationship and would always file for divorce and then call it off in the last minute. They finally realised there is no happiness in being together after giving each other a million chances. No wonder he doesn’t miss Robin. Guess it’s never too late to give ‘finding true love’ another chance because everlasting marriages no longer seem to guarantee anything.
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