For a generation that measures popularity by the number of “likes” and comments one gets on recently uploaded photos or updated statuses, it’s clear that social mediums like Facebook, MySpace and Twitter are the gauging meter for success and what it means to have the perfect life. But like everything, it too has a dark side. The most palpable effect of this is on the psyche of the people who use such mediums.

Take the case of Shirish Tomar.* Tomar shot an expensive portfolio and uploaded it on Facebook. He was expecting rave reviews from his 500-plus friend list, not to mention genuine interest from industry professionals. But his efforts and expectations were in vain. His dreams of generating virtual hype were quashed. Such were the implications that he went into major depression.
This is not an isolated incident either. Similar is the case of Udita Singh*, who was immensely open about her relationship status on social networking sites like Facebook. Eventually, when she broke up it became public knowledge. Her pain was only exacerbated by its disclosure to her family and friends. “After a point, it was difficult to handle the curiosity that my break-up generated amongst friends in my network. I had to stay offline for six months to stall the barrage of questions,” recollects Udita.
Such experiences may sound childish at first, but psychologists are of the unanimous opinion that such is the impact of social mediums today, that suicidal tendencies and depressive syndromes are quite common.
“Let’s accept the fact that most people today are on Facebook, Twitter or any other social media to garner attention and boost their egos. Everyone intends to portray that life is perfect. Any negative publicity, harsh remarks or exposures of vulnerability carries a notion of shame and puts immense peer pressure on the youth,” says Dr Pulkit Sharma, clinical psychologist, VIMHANS. It’s this pressure that sometimes gets very difficult to handle. An extreme manifestation of all these was the case of Malini Murma, a bright student of IIM Bangalore who committed suicide last year when she found that her boyfriend had declared on Facebook that he “dumped” her.
The problem here is that especially with features like Facebook’s new Timeline, every wall post is open to comment, as is a status update. On Twitter, tweeting addicts post nearly every move with something akin to pride. Much of what used to be personal is now on public display. The result? The creation of virtual realities and immense real-time social disconnects.
“We end up creating a virtual reality. As people update statuses, the need to meet in person or call up diminishes since you already know whatever is going on in the other person’s life. The virtual world becomes the real world. Emotions, that are the most basic traits in human beings, do not get conveyed leading to loss of personal touch,” explains Shobhna Srivastava, consultant, Clinical & Neuro Psychology.
Bottom line? Social media is a great way to connect with friends and family. However, as the old saying goes, discretion is always the better part of valour.
*Names changed to conceal identity