Romance is in the air
Valentines Day is round the corner, and romance is in the air. Romance is so heady — like a drug or an elixir. I think the world is in love with the idea of a romance, of the invigorating adrenaline rush and excitement, that makes you want to be your slimmest and best, that motivates success, makes you want to jog, to write poetry, to sing.
The Bollywood song My dil goes mmmmmm... so aptly describes the euphoria of being in love. That’s exactly why we are in love with the ecstasy of ‘falling’ in love- seemingly more than us rising, growing and elevating ourselves in love. Often with the most inappropriate person who’s probably just completely inadequate and wrong for us. While it’s all ok to grow with our mistakes and learn and move on, it’s when we cement it into a marriage that we head for disaster. Because marriage is not about valentine hearts, kisses, cakes, tweets, unending coffees and sweet-nothing-dates. Instead marriage is about responsibility, respect, maturity, a home and being accountable and dependable for ourselves. Seeing each other through the pits and falls, giving hope when your spouse is hopeless, not throwing tantrums when your spouse goes through a bad patch, taking stock when your partner is going through a bad health phase and not saying ‘I told you so’ like the Lockhorns when you did tell your spouse that he’d be making a mistake.
Through life’s twists and turns my heart too went through tumultuous upheavals at regular intervals, that might have recorded highly on the Richter scale. I did manage to clamber out of the quagmire in recognition and disillusionment, seeking, over the rim, the nearest nunnery to enroll into often, but learning along the way that one has to take off the rose tinted heart framed glasses of desire, infatuation, ardor and look at a situation more pragmatically.
It happens to the best of us, never mind how beautiful you are, how intelligent, how scintillating, but mistakes of an imagined romance is something none of us is spared from. It’s when we can be saved and pull out of the trance in time and spring back that we should count ourselves lucky. In life’s arid landscape, most of us have traipsed the path of these oases in a myopic bubble of romance that at closer quarters we recognised for mirage, until hopefully a happy matrimony should bring a ‘happily ever after’. So I’m wishing you a delightful Valentine, but tread with caution and with cautious vision!
Nisha JamVwal is a celebrity designer and leading luxury brand consultant. You can write to her at
nishajamvwal@gmail.com
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