What men want
Nowadays, women are more forward — gone are the days when they waited anxiously by the phone, urging it to ring. Today’s woman goes for the kill and the man is spoilt for choice. The women who don’t make the cut and are wallflowers — ‘sitting out the dances’ — are left wondering what they lack. What is it that puts a man off and what turns him on? Why is the fabulous romance that is seen in films not brilliantly lighting up their lives? Women are anxious to get an answer to these eternal questions. This is evident from the many emails inundating my box, asking me what puts a man off, and what should a woman do to make a relationship happen in her life. This led me to asking some suave and savvy men about what would put them off. Because my take is that before a man is attracted, he must not be repelled.
While different strokes for different folks is valid, there are some things that can be considered rule of thumb for making a relationship happen. In the physical attributes, body odour and bad breath topped the list of all bar none in my very amusing survey. Obesity is a put off, said many. Bad skin — not only facial, but skin all over — is a big no no for most. Dirty nails and, strange as it may sound, dry elbows and knees, can be a turn off. “You don’t want women with facial hair! Or any body hair!” said one of the subjects of my multiple interviews. Conversely, while a man is attracted to a lovely woman, the catch is that undue preoccupation with looks won’t do the trick. Being too concerned about the way you look, and peeking at every mirror in the elevator, will not win you too many hearts.
An interesting discovery, even for me, is that a man is attracted to a woman who is not always eating like a bird, but enjoys a good meal with him. This shows that she is not self-obsessed and savors her food, something that he might want to share and enjoy with her.
In the category of temperament and character, the men were most vociferous and unanimous about their abhorrence of superficiality and lack of character. It appears that men across the board are attracted to depth and intelligence. Bimbettes always yacking on the phone, or BBMing feverishly on a Blackberry in chat groups with female friends, seem to be a put-off for most men.
Bad English is a turn off. Girls who talk too much about themselves are a turn off. So are women who can’t speak/hold a conversation! “Some of the women I’ve met have gone on and on about how popular they were/are, and how every guy in the world is hitting on them! So annoying!” exclaim the men.
His loved one being loquacious might have been attractive to Shahid Kapoor in Jab We Met. But in reality, jabbering non-stop can make a man want to run away. Interrupting him when he’s sharing with you and jumping in at the first opportunity to have your say, is not attractive. Give him a listening ear and he will appreciate you.
Watch this space for tricks that can help make you that special someone in a man’s life.
Nisha is a celebrity designer and leading luxury brand consultant.
You can write to her at nishajamvwal@gmail.com
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