Arjun Iyer (name changed) is a 14-year-old boy, who would seem to have all that children of his age would want. He has loving parents who dote on him, a steady source of pocket money, and full freedom to spend this on films and to go out with friends. And since he is naturally intelligent, he gets good grades in his exams too. But he is still an angry child.
His mother reveals that any attempt on their part to reprimand him or try to get him to do something he doesn’t want, will be met with a tantrum or worse. “Sometimes we feel we have spoilt him beyond redemption. He screams when we tell him not to go out or come home on time or tell him to not spend too much time watching television or in front of the computer,” she complains, adding that they never faced such problems with their elder son.
Behaviour experts agree that the levels of tolerance have gone down among today’s youth, who are known to lose their cool over trivial issues. “Recent research conducted by psychiatrists in the country showed that the average time before a person in the age group of 18 to 35 years loses his/her cool, is only 9.6 minutes,” says Dr Suresh Rangabhashyam, a consultant psychiatrist and a behavioural expert.
Recently, we also had news of an 18-year-old upmarket from an affluent family, who would steal just for the thrill of the crime. Dr Harish Shetty, renowned psychiatrist feels otherwise. “Parents must learn to differentiate between anger and a tantrum. Anger is a positive emotion, throwing a tantrum is not,” he says.