A reader recently wrote in to the advice section of a popular men’s magazine asking how he should stop his wife from sporting the bald look she wanted to try out. Radical? Yes. But men often try to spell out just how their wives or girlfriends should dress — from the clothes they should sport, to the way they apply their cosmetics or the way they wear their hair. Some go to the extent of dictating their partner’s behaviour. And while women certainly welcome suggestions, a dictatorial attitude may be enough to get their blood boiling. So how much is too much? Relationship expert Seema Hingorrany offers a few thumb rules that can act as a guide in such situations:
The man has a say only if the couple is committed.
A “say” is healthy as long as it remains just that — a say, an opinion. Don’t let it reach the level of nagging.
If your partner chooses not to respond to your suggestions, let it drop. But if she is in a good mood, then you could try talking to her and explaining just why you don’t like a particular thing.
w Remember, sharing opinions is healthy. But trying to impose your opinion only gives rise to problems.