Secure yourself as an individual

Sep 08, 2013 - Anupam Kher

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Ask Anupam

I am 18 years old and I want to start something new and on my own but my parents are against it. I need financial support. My dad is not very supportive and doesn’t approve of the idea. How shall I convince them or what else can I do?
Prateek

A. Well, there are many enterprising people who have done wonderful things with fresh ideas and have been creative and successful. And I am sure your idea is creative as well. I suggest you have your business planned out on paper to the smallest of details. Spend time doing research. You could also take up courses that would support your creative idea. Your dad must have spent his life earning that money, in caution, slowly and with a lot of diligence and discipline to make sure your family is secure. I hope you respect the fact when you are dealing with him.
Everyone comes to a stage where they want or need something. It is crucial how you conduct yourself in these situations, because you would carry this pattern into your business as well. You could involve and take advice from your father and discuss everything with him and at some stage he may just go along with your plan, after he feels secure of the fact that you are capable of executing it. You must invest time, education and planning into it. Be patient. Be creative. Invest. Convince. Have a vision. Set principles.

I am a 21-year-old woman. I belong to a middle-class family. My parents love me unconditionally. I am in a relationship since last four years with a man who is from a different caste and is also financially backward compared to us. But I know that once he settles down, I will be happy with him. I just don’t know how to convince my parents. Can you please help me with a solution to this problem?
Nivedita

A. Well Nivedita, I respect relationships. Every relationship has a purpose in our life. Healthy family equations, security, happiness, values. It is so important and however much we may deny the fact, our parents are an integral part of this equation. They might agree once you convince them, but what you need to truly focus on now is your education and secure yourself as an individual.
Discuss these things with your boyfriend and see if you both feel that happiness and stability is a quality you will be able to retain. Think things through.
Sometimes people marry out of love and that is the only thing they have. But when they need to overcome things together, it crumbles, because love is not enough. I suggest now focus on education and your personal growth and see how things go.

Readers can send their queries to askanupam@anupamkhercompany.com

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