I was barely half-way into Ready when images of pissing and defecating artists started crowding my head. First to arrive was Italian artist Piero Manzoni who, in 1961, stuffed 90 tiny cans, each with 30 grams of his stuff, labelled them “Merda d’Artista” (Artist’s Shit), and sent them around the world to be bought at the price of 30 grams of gold. Manzoni’s excreta stunt was meant “to expose the gullible nature of the art-buying public”.

It takes special kind of idiocy to think of a love triangle involving a gay boy, a slutty girl and a horny jinnat (jinn log who reside in mazaars). But our Bollywood producers don’t just find such people, they also give them money and then hire actors to do the panting and talking.

There is really no reason for anyone to spend their good money and precious time on Kucch Luv Jaisaa. Of course, producer Vipul Shah and his wife Shifaali Shah have done their bit to ensure that the film works — she, by dropping several kilos before demanding a heroine’s role; and he, after taking a good look at his wife

Sit back and think of that school day when your mother packed in a special surprise treat in your tiffin box. Now, think of that rather long and hot day at school when you forgot to bring your dabba. Stanley ka Dabba packs in both, that joy and that sadness, in a story that is deeply moving and yet delightful.

If Shagird had a tag-line, it would read: Cop eat cop, and then some. Director Tigmanshu Dhulia's Shagird is a sly ensemble drama of deadly, neurotic vipers who come in khaki, khadi and other varieties. Usual stuff. But the story that Dhulia lays out to establish this is complicated, at times intriguingly so, but sometimes needlessly twisted.

Ragini MMS opens with rousing, breathless chanting of the Hanuman Chalisa and swiftly gets your pulse rate going. By the time the credits end and you are knocking at Ragini’s door (the film’s first scene), you are already in the mood — excited apprehension.

Haunted is a B-grade film that has tricked its way to the multiplexes (not that I care for them multiplexes, but that’s another story). The tricks here are from director Vikram Bhatt’s PR and 3D kitty — Haunted is being sold as India’s first stereoscopic 3D film. But strip those, squish the lone biting cobra and say “statue” to the flying bricks, and what remains is a musty Ramsay Brothers product.

Luv Ka The End is an action-packed episode in the life of the Tupperwear People. The Tupperwear People, kindly note, come in vibrant colours, are efficient, air-tight, microwaveable, very plastic and made from a Made In America concentrate. They are different from the Pearlpet People who usually come in packs of three or six, are also plastic, but scratch easy, are not microwaveable and transparently desi.

Shor In The City is a compelling, delirious promo of Mumbai’s tapori world. Its concern is not with the usual — the quick-shooter or the slick holdup artist. Shor is in love with the endearing, idiot goonda whose gun may be pointed at another, but whose bullet will somehow turn and return to bite his own sorry arse.

Most movies these days are desperate to please. They want to keep you happy, to seduce you with sexy songs, sexy bodies, sexy locations. They want you to settle in comfortably, in perfect homes glowing with the warmth of beautiful love affairs and solid relationships. But sometimes, one angry one stomps along, to challenge your world, your worldview.