Anupam Kher

Q. I’m 15 and have a common problem. I had a crush on a guy who used to be good friends with me. When he got to know that I had a crush on him he just stopped talking to me. It didn’t tear me apart but I keep thinking about him. I’m ashamed of myself for feeling like this. Please show me a way out of this. My exams are going on and I need to concentrate.
Anonymous

A. My dear, it’s a natural thing in life at your age to have a crush on someone. It’s sad that he stopped talking to you in spite of being your friend. But at the age of 15 when everything is new and different and everyone wants to create their own identity and wants to overcome awkwardness, etc., we end up taking everything we feel more seriously. Don’t be ashamed of the way you feel.
It’s natural to think about the person you have a crush on but these things will happen to you many times. Sometimes you will be worried about friends, sometimes a boyfriend, sometimes your parents. Now you are growing up. You will understand and feel different things. You will notice everything that goes on around you. However, what I am trying to say is these things happen. Don’t worry.
Be a happy person. Enjoy having a crush on someone and it does not matter what he thinks. You should spend these years investing in yourself. Being happy, playing, developing skills, reading, watching art and cinema and studying.
There is a whole world of beautiful things and you should make these things a part of your life. I know you miss your friend but you can be happy and hard working when you do so.
Q. I want to become an actor when I grow up. I’m 16 years old and wish to complete my education first. I know my parents will never agree. They think the business is not safe for girls. I don’t know how to convince them. I’ve always dreamt of becoming an actor and I don’t want to give up my dream. Please tell me what to do.
Anonymous

A. I think you should follow your dream, but whatever your dream is, it’s always better to be educated. It’s not just a security but it adds to your persona. But let me tell you that acting is just like every other profession. There is an equal amount of hard work and struggle as there is in college or school. As far as being safe is concerned this business is absolutely safe. It really depends on the kind of person you are and how you deal with your career. Work hard and towards your dream and it’s possible. I understand your parents will feel protective about you. It is natural. Once you are a little older and have conducted your life with responsibility, I’m sure your parents will let you pursue your dreams.

Q. I am 20 years old and pursuing B.Tech. in the mechanical branch. My question to you is that everyone says you must have a goal in your life but I don’t know how to select a goal. I mean, what should one look for: money, power, self-satisfaction? At times I decide that I just need success in my life. My goal in life is just to get known to others for my work, for my qualities. I don’t need money. I just want everyone to know me because of my work. I’ve never thought of whether I’ll get a job or not. If someone asks me my answer is always that I am confident of myself. No matter if I get a job or not, I know I will do something because I trust my work. But I also feel that I should get all the luxury, money, lifestyle and so on. I am not focused on my goal. Please tell me what is more imp-ortant. Give me a mantra so that whenever I think of things other than my goal, I am reminded of your mantra and all the negative energy exits from me. I really need a guide to put me on the path to success.
Abhishek Tiwari

A. My dear, let me give you the secret to luck and prosperity and success and recognition — hard work. You are studying — study hard. Sometimes we figure our true calling in childhood, sometimes in college and sometimes when we start working.
Teach yourself to get focused, to work hard, to love and enjoy your studies, get organised and as of now focus on getting good grades, developing new skills. There is no point getting upset over things that are out of your control.
By getting good grades life will give you a bigger platform comparatively and you can chose from it. Focus on what’s in your hands, how you speak, your studies, your values, learn how to treat people well, invest more in other skills, etc. Every small thing will take you far. Worrying about other things won’t.