Where’s the change?

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Aamir Khanji must be feeling good after he so badly daraoed the dowry demons last Sunday. But, you know, like all good investigative agencies, my Saturday Lunch-cum-Tambola Kitty Party (SLTKP) has decided to find out how much impact Aamirji’s aatma-cleansing yatras are actually having. We call it “Operation Badlaav”.
So when the May Queen of our SLTKP asked who wanted to investigate what, I was the first “Princess Kitty” to raise my hand. Hai! Mrs Menon ki toh jealousy se death hi ho gayi. I was delighted and that’s why, when May Queen Mrs Bhalla asked me my area of investigation, I fata-fat said I’ll check out Aamir’s favourite channel, Star Plus, and report back next Saturday.
So with a nice little scented pad and pencil, I sat down to observe and take notes.
Aamir Sirji Sunday morning ko aate hain, but the rest of the week Star Plus kya gul khilata hai, zara dekhiye.
On Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon, where Arnab has been kidnapped and his wife Khushi is very worried, paapi Shyam, instead of helping, is trying to seduce Khushi. He took a nice long bath in her husband's bathroom, got into a fluffy towel and dangled his fresh-fresh jism in front of Khushi. Kyun, aakhir kyun must a woman always have to make tough-tough choices — worry about husband or play bed games with item?
My next stop was this atrocity called Diya Aur Baati Hum where Sandhya, who wants to be an IPS officer, has been married off to halwai Sooraj who first threw Sandhya out of the house and is now running around looking for her. Sandhya will, of course, return and be a good wife and aadarsh bahu. Uff!
Next there was Saathiya where good bahu Gopi is always under some sort of threat from the women in her life. And now toh even her husband is torturing her, by playing Hello, Ex-girlfriend. Simpering bahu, conniving ex, duffer husband, hippo saas... need I say more about how much life has changed for our telly ladies.
I think that Aamir Sirji should conduct a workshop for all the creative heads of entertainment channels, especially Star Plus, and teach them how to create a new world where women have discovered clothes that require less than six yards and are not made of silk, where every female head doesn’t drip sindoor, where every female heart is not heavy because she has put too much namak in sabji, where women sometimes venture out of their havelis on their own and where a glare from saas can be met with a stare, and a smile. Aamirji can call it, Bahu, Go Get a Life.

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